My previously-single friends around me started to get attached. Even one of them at my age (btw I'm just 21)just got married. While I start to bother myself over my ever-standing singlehood, some discussion which I heard on 958FM put me back on the track where my mum want me to be.
They were discussing the growing trend now in Singapore about MBA(Married But Available(=Open marriage)), premarital sex, blah blah blah. Plus the previous day, Ms. C who has more experience working in the outside world told us of what she heard in offices and confirms my suspicion that nowadays, a lot, nope, should be DAMN LOT of people are doing ONS and commiting pre/extra-marital affairs. So to the present context, what's the meaning of marriage when husbands and wives are not holding their vows anymore. Is marriage really a dumb restriction on a man's nature?
Take that restriction away and won't man behave like an animal. But isn't man an animal? You may say it's different and that man is a higher level being. But what's wrong with satisfying own sexual need while practising birth control(excluding abortion) at the same time? Should marriage not exist from the beginning and gave people a false sense of security, commitment and everlasting love? Why do people want to build happiness from all these elements make up by some silly ones? (I think marriage was created by some selfish men in the past. If it's woman, would man get to have to much wives in the past?) Why don't they advocate happiness from freedom? Why in the first place has monogamy exist in dictionary?
To some friends, you may be shocked to read this. I really lose my bearing on the matter of marriage. I grow up in a very conservative family (and yet I do watch Sex and the City sometime. Ah bad influence isn't is?) where my parent expect me to have a boyfriend only when I'm out to work and get married and then have legal sex thereafter. Pre-marital sex is definitely a NONO for me.
I start telling my friends that I'm not going for marriage and they start retailate that "once you're in a romance, you never think like that" I guess that's how people get blinded by love and 80% of them realise it's the monster they're forever bounded to only after the vows, right? Didn't I say one of my friends just got married in Jan at the begining? While we are gossiping about this, they also feel like getting married too. Getting married is like a gamble to me. Even my mum say so. Maybe it's wrong thing to do. But getting married before seeing the outside world? To me, it like a horrendus mistake.
Ms C said that must really choose the right man in order to have a blessed marital life. But how many of you get to see the real person you attached before taking up that gamble. Take my neighbour for example. Before marriage, he saw a gentle side of his woman, tall, pretty and demure but never did he expect that later his wife will shout or scream at him over teeny weeny matter in the public. I could sense his embarassment and FEAR whenever he meekly told his wife to lower her volume. Remaining adamant about my view, Ms C rebuked, "Take your parents for example. They're still so loving." I wished to tell her that "Sometime you only get see the surface and not beyond." but I didn't. I don't wish to complicate thing for myself.
I once told my mum that to see if he is the One is to stay together for sometime before getting married. My mum scoffed at my stupidity and said that the guy actually gains. If he left, I lose my virigintiy to him and can't even get half his assets. Now money and viriginity come into the picture. I wonder how much would people bid for it if i post my best photo in the ebay with starting bid of $100. Hm...That shall remain an unanswered wonder for me now and then. BTW, it's the lastest craze in ebay.
Maybe my friends are right. When (If ever) i got shot by Mr. Cupid (is that how you spell?), what I had said above will no longer stands true. And I hope so. A man-made bliss would still be enjoyable afterall.
No matter what, to marry or not, it's very important for woman to have independent financial backing. At least you left with options when your guy decide to left you for greener pasture. Get ready with your ˽·¿Ç®°É!
They were discussing the growing trend now in Singapore about MBA(Married But Available(=Open marriage)), premarital sex, blah blah blah. Plus the previous day, Ms. C who has more experience working in the outside world told us of what she heard in offices and confirms my suspicion that nowadays, a lot, nope, should be DAMN LOT of people are doing ONS and commiting pre/extra-marital affairs. So to the present context, what's the meaning of marriage when husbands and wives are not holding their vows anymore. Is marriage really a dumb restriction on a man's nature?
Take that restriction away and won't man behave like an animal. But isn't man an animal? You may say it's different and that man is a higher level being. But what's wrong with satisfying own sexual need while practising birth control(excluding abortion) at the same time? Should marriage not exist from the beginning and gave people a false sense of security, commitment and everlasting love? Why do people want to build happiness from all these elements make up by some silly ones? (I think marriage was created by some selfish men in the past. If it's woman, would man get to have to much wives in the past?) Why don't they advocate happiness from freedom? Why in the first place has monogamy exist in dictionary?
To some friends, you may be shocked to read this. I really lose my bearing on the matter of marriage. I grow up in a very conservative family (and yet I do watch Sex and the City sometime. Ah bad influence isn't is?) where my parent expect me to have a boyfriend only when I'm out to work and get married and then have legal sex thereafter. Pre-marital sex is definitely a NONO for me.
I start telling my friends that I'm not going for marriage and they start retailate that "once you're in a romance, you never think like that" I guess that's how people get blinded by love and 80% of them realise it's the monster they're forever bounded to only after the vows, right? Didn't I say one of my friends just got married in Jan at the begining? While we are gossiping about this, they also feel like getting married too. Getting married is like a gamble to me. Even my mum say so. Maybe it's wrong thing to do. But getting married before seeing the outside world? To me, it like a horrendus mistake.
Ms C said that must really choose the right man in order to have a blessed marital life. But how many of you get to see the real person you attached before taking up that gamble. Take my neighbour for example. Before marriage, he saw a gentle side of his woman, tall, pretty and demure but never did he expect that later his wife will shout or scream at him over teeny weeny matter in the public. I could sense his embarassment and FEAR whenever he meekly told his wife to lower her volume. Remaining adamant about my view, Ms C rebuked, "Take your parents for example. They're still so loving." I wished to tell her that "Sometime you only get see the surface and not beyond." but I didn't. I don't wish to complicate thing for myself.
I once told my mum that to see if he is the One is to stay together for sometime before getting married. My mum scoffed at my stupidity and said that the guy actually gains. If he left, I lose my virigintiy to him and can't even get half his assets. Now money and viriginity come into the picture. I wonder how much would people bid for it if i post my best photo in the ebay with starting bid of $100. Hm...That shall remain an unanswered wonder for me now and then. BTW, it's the lastest craze in ebay.
Maybe my friends are right. When (If ever) i got shot by Mr. Cupid (is that how you spell?), what I had said above will no longer stands true. And I hope so. A man-made bliss would still be enjoyable afterall.
No matter what, to marry or not, it's very important for woman to have independent financial backing. At least you left with options when your guy decide to left you for greener pasture. Get ready with your ˽·¿Ç®°É!
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